The other day I saw this quote on Facebook,
In my case my bed is also the place where most often the reality of the tasks on my To Do list kicks in. Let us say one such revelation happened last night.
I so….didn’t want to break this news to you this way. Remember the Old Lucketts Store Spring Market that I was gushing about all along; the place where I found the vintage movie reels, the lard can, and a ton of other stuff? Ever since the Old Lucketts Store announced the dates for this year’s Spring Market I’ve been making plans of going, only this time as a vendor instead of a shopper. Ya, you heard me right, as a vendor!
So for the last two weeks I have been making lists and lists of the things I could sell in my booth while battling fears on whether I’m even prepared to take the giant leap from a blogger to a store owner. To my amazement I came up with quite a few interesting ideas to fill up the booth complete with pricing schedules based on the cost and # of labor hrs! I told ya I’m a chronic planner. Before I get y’all excited, nope I’m not going ahead with those plans.
Why oh why would I strike down my long cherished goal of opening a store especially when I had the full support of my family and friends? It pains me to the point of actually tearing up while writing this to admit that I can’t after all do everything! This coming from a forever optimist who believes that she can do any thing in this world if she sets her mind to it (that is if you don’t count singing and dancing, I totally suck at those).
The Spring Market is not until May 18 -19, which is 3 months away. But to a full time working blogger mom that translates to 13 weekends out of which for 7 weekends nothing is gonna be done ’coz we have other social commitments. That leaves me with 6 weekends to work on projects for the market juggling baseball, soccer, dance, and God knows what.
Not too bad for a person who thrives under pressure. I’m one of those folks who procrastinate things (not any more ’coz nowadays I don’t even have time to procrastinate) till the last minute so I can get high on the pressure. I know, if I work my butt off I can get it done but at the expense of what? My time with my family, on home chores, on the blog, already dwindling sleeping hrs, my sanity……my life!
I’m borrowing a line from an article that I read recently; when talking about how working moms balance it all the author says, “There is no balance, only carefully controlled chaos.” This pretty much sums up my life too!
No worries, I’m not going anywhere. I love it the way it is now. Can’t even dream about not blogging. This daily têtê-a-têtê with you guys have been such a great creative, inspirational, and even a venting outlet for me. It is just that the whole idea of wading into new territories has been put on hold for now.
PS: I’m still kicking myself about the lost opportunity to actually make all the cool stuff I dreamed up. What the heck, I even bought a few things over the last 2 weekends so I could work on them! Maybe I should open an Etsy store? Then I can work at my own pace? What do you say? Ever had to give up on a dream? Was it tough coming to terms with it?